Leonard’s Losers: JCC Modified Fastpitch Week 3

By Leonard Postosties

Well, hello my dear, good friends, it’s your old friend and pal, Leonard Postosties, and his faithful buddy, Percy Peabody, itching to bring you the latest results of Sunday Morning Mayhem, Crying, and Lying, otherwise known as the MJCCA Modified-Fast Pitch Softball League.

While I thought Week Two was full of “surprizes”, Week No. 3 was more crazy than a mound-full of fire ants fightin over two bare feet!

Let’s get on started with the two Morning Sunrise Service Games that paired Jeff “Shmear” Mironov and his Motown Millies, battlin Adam Abramson and his Green Mountain Apples.

From what Percy could tell me, not even a long, over the fence blast by the Apples’ captain could contain Motown players Hogan, Mironov, Lyons, and Golden, who seemed to make the base paths their own personal jogging trail!

In a wild and woolly contest reminiscent of the Battle of Manassas, the boys from Motown, sliced and diced the Apples enroute to a convincing victory.

Next door on Field 5, Josh Wikoff and his Boys of Summer took on Gene Benator and his Capitol Hill Senators in a shootout that would have rivaled the Hatfields and McCoys of years gone by.

In a slugfest that featured more dinks and dribbles than a leaky faucet, the Summer Boys edged the Senators 17-14, to take undisputed possession of their Division, while sending the Senators off to filibuster about their 0-2 start.

While Justin Katz and his Kosher Kittens enjoyed their off week up in the Catskills, relaxin and munching on bagels and cream cheese, and listening to music from Dirty Dancing, Jody Blanke and his Band of Brothers put a whipping on Rob Scheinman and his Band of Merry Men., bringing em down from last week’s win, quicker than a wounded Apollo 13.

Percy and his woman friend, Hilda told me that Blanke’s Brothers were led by wunderkind, Sandy (“Don’t count me out yet”) Hartman and veteran Scott “Comrade”Moscow. Like a fine wine that gets better with age, the nimble and crafty septuagenarian Hartman, blasted a two-run double over the outfield, and the trusted, veteran Moscow couldn’t be kept off the bases, going 4-4. Musta thought he was facing the wobbly, kneed Benator.

Over on Field 5, Captain Mike Kornheiser’s Corncobs, put a hurtin on Ken Danis and his Dangerfield Dollies. Fresh off their win over the Senators, the Dollies, who were looking to join Wikoff’s Boys of Summer atop their division, instead ran into pitcher Jonah Goldberg, who was sharper than a new buzz saw bought at Home Depot.

Goldberg refused to get rattled by some shaky defense early on, and held the Dollies to just one run enroute to a 10-1 victory. In addition to the “Big Fella” on the mound, the Cobs were once again led by “Mad“ Max Gertz, who early on, must think it’s still July 4^th, as he is lighting up opposing pitchers as if they were roman candles.

Well, as he is prone to do, my old sidekick and statistician, Percy Peabody just tapped me on the shoulder and said it’s time to get on down the road. Hilda is having a bake session at the farm and Percy’s gots to drop her at home.

So until we meet again, Happy Trails (Love that Roy Rogers), and keep the Sunny Side up.

Leonard

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